Showing posts with label expectaion. Show all posts
Showing posts with label expectaion. Show all posts

Saturday, February 27, 2016

Progress?

Just a quick one today. I wanted to update you on the dubious progress we're making on cleaning up the bedroom we've been using for storage.You can read the first post here. I took a picture, but I'm too embarrassed to show you until I have an "after" picture to put next to it. I realize this means I might never show it to anyone because, like I said before, it might never happen.
This is one of those things where it gets worse before it gets better. We've made progress,but you can't tell by looking at the room. (I can tell by how wiped out I am) I still don't know what I'm going to do with all the stuff that's in there and I'm reaching a point where I'm not going to be able to do it all on my own.
Sounds like a lot of things in life, doesn't it? Sometimes progress is almost invisible, we don't know how things will turn out and asking for help is a big key to overcoming challenges.
You might be thinking about how dumb all of this sounds but I bet there are a few who get it. And I guess there's another parallel here. The end result is really important to me so I'm willing to put in the effort it takes to achieve it.
Stay tuned! I hope to have something happy to share before too long.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Roadblocks


I'm going to be totally real with you right now: I'm feeling like a failure this morning. A friend told me last night that someone went to Amazon to get a copy of my novel and there aren't any there. My book has been backlisted. I knew that already, but it was no fun to see the word "unavailable" there next to the picture of my book. This is not unusual. It happens to lots of authors. I still have copies of my novel and it hasn't just disappeared from the world, but it still stings. I'm working hard not to take it personally.
I'm warring with myself this morning. This is one of those times when I want to sit in the road and quit. The roadblock is steep and rocky. I can't see the other side. My metaphorical feet hurt and I'm tempted to give up.
But I won't.
I see lots of work ahead. A bunch of places to go, all of them outside of my cozy little comfort zone. So here I go. I'm pretty sure that if I had to do it on my own I wouldn't be able to. I'm not going to claim that I can just grit my teeth and pick myself up and keep trying. Not without Him anyway.
But Jesus has already acknowledged my bruises and promised to help me up out of the dust.
Just a few minutes ago Beth Moore sent out these two tweets:

This is how this earthly thing tends to go: we don't turn out to be as awesome as we hoped & Jesus turns out to be better than we believed.
Personal crisis: looking our un-awesomeness in the eye. If we can deal, we're set for some wild and woolly Jesus-awesomeness.



So I'm trying be excited about what's coming because I know He has a plan. It's going to take work. It's going to take work just to choose not to sit in the road and cry for one minute longer than I should. 
I would  not have chosen this roadblock if I were mapping my path. But I'm not that kind of Author. I know He knows best and with His help I'll put my shoes back on my tired feet and start climbing.




Monday, February 22, 2016

Pretty Pie Plans


Yesterday I told you about the peach cream pies I made and the plans I made about them.
Sunday is a big day for planning, isn't it? I always seem to have so many things to remember. We were going to have lunch at Grandma's after church. I was in charge of bringing the pie.
But one of my boys woke up not feeling very well. He laid on the couch all pale and droopy.So we stayed home.
He's much better now, running around outside enjoying the out-of-season winter sunshine.
I'm glad he's feeling better. I'm also sorry we missed church today, but I was reminded that our plans are not the ultimate authority. Not even good plans.
Today my boys stayed home and painted a wooden truck that Keith made for them. I had word fun with my Wreck this Journal (you can see some of the finished pages here) while Keith watched someone on TV install a beautiful hardwood floor.
I'm okay with our plans not working about because I know I'm not the One in charge.
And in case you were wondering, the pie is delicious.


Thursday, February 11, 2016

Expecting Unicorns


Sometimes things don't turn out the way we expect. In fact usually they don't. Sometimes it's a disappointment.  We loved the book and counted the days until the movie came out but we're all mad because they changed the ending and cast a short blonde instead of a tall brunette and cut our favorite scene. Sometimes the unexpected is a good thing. How many times is waiting for an unpleasant event much, much worse than actually doing the thing? Sometimes we think something is going to be a trial, but instead it's a joy. And sometimes things turn out neither better nor worse than we expected just different. 

But what I'm thinking about right now is the kind of expectation that ties in invisibly with our wishes.
I wonder how I would have felt if, when I was little, someone had told me that someday I'd have a unicorn. I would kept an eye out every single day waiting for her to show up. I would have fantasized about all the things we would do together. I would brush her glorious mane and ride her around wearing my flowing dresses. We would sit in green meadows looking picturesque and princessy. In fact I would probably get an honorary crown because how could  a girl own unicorn and not be the princess of something?
Eunice the Unicorn
But, as you might have guessed, no one ever told me I would be getting a unicorn, so I wasn't disappointed but amused when Eunice came along. I wasn't expecting her so I had no dreams of princessing around to be crushed by her blatant goatiness. She didn't have a mane to brush and if I don't have any flowing unicorn-riding dresses anyway.
But there have been times when I have expected unicorns. I thought a unicorn was coming, and it came, but in the form of a one-horned goat. 
It's so hard not to be disappointed. Especially when I allow the ugly joy-stealer of comparison to have an opinion about it. But while I was thinking about Eunice and her unconventional unicorn ways, I wondered what the Bible had to say about expectation.  
There are lots of quotes and quips lurking around that talk about expectation. Shakespeare said "Expectation is the root of all heartache." Someone else said "What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be." 
There are some truth in those statements and others like them, but it seems rather bleak, doesn't it? So what does the Bible say?
The Bible doesn't talk about expectation as much as it does about hope. 

      Psalm 62:5  For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him.

      Philippians 1:20 As it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed,       but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life       or by death.

       Proverbs 24:14 Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off.

       Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.


And I am reminded of something.  That if we delight ourselves in The Lord He will give us the desires of our hearts. If my delight is in Him then my hope submits to His perfect plan. My expectations  can take a backseat to hope.  When God blesses us with a one-horned goat instead of mythical beauty, we can serve up our displaced expectation, or even our disappointment, as worship. We can be thankful that, whatever the outcome, He has our best interest at heart. Even when we don't understand. Even when it's different than what He's done for others. He never lets us down. Every single thing that He allows, gives, takes away, or prevents comes from his inestimable love. Even, and maybe especially, when it's not what we expected. 

Friday, January 29, 2016

Unexpected Joy

Unexpected Joy

        It was a May Term class. Models of Youth Ministry, I think it was called. There would be a small group of us, five guys and three girls, traveling around together with our professor and learning about different youth ministries. It sounded like fun and I was looking forward to it.Until our very first meeting, that is. I remember sitting there at a table in silence as the eight of us just sort of stared around the room. No one talking or joking or asking about majors or hometowns. Nope, we were just sitting there as if we were trying to see who could be the most boring.
 Ugh. 
        I am not a shy person. I like people, I like conversations and connections. I remember thinking that this was going to be the worst class ever. A month-long awkward silence stuck in a van with people who didn't want to know me. 
I was SO wrong.We had a wonderful time. It turned out to be one of my favorite classes ever. Now, when I think back on that class I smile. We had inside jokes and nicknames (for example, two of the guys called each other “Seth” and I'm still not sure anyone knows why) we found out about each other's lives and families. It was amazing. I would be thrilled to see those people today. And here I thought it was going to be a study in how not to have fun.
I was reminded of this special time in my life as I was reading Kay Warren's book about joy. She was talking about Jesus and his disciples and offered a perspective that we don't often think about: They were joyful. They had fun together. The Bible doesn't tell us that they had inside jokes or nicknames, but I wouldn't be surprised if they did. Their ministry wasn't only about duty. These men were friends. I know when I read the gospels I sort of imagine Jesus and the twelve saying things like, “Okay, gentlemen, this is the part where we're supposed to go to Samaria, because this is when Jesus talks to that woman at the well. We'll go get some food, like it says we're supposed to, and meet Jesus back at the well at one. Okay? Let's go.” 
Of course it wasn't like that, but I can't be the only one who has overlooked this idea. I'm not trying to make the Bible say something it doesn't. I was encouraged by this perspective- thinking about the realness of Jesus. I assumed that my class was going to be dull and unfriendly, but it was a joy. I make assumptions when I read about Jesus, too. What a joy to think that He was and is not only Lord, but someone who laughs and enjoys. Jesus isn't just the One we go to with our hurts, but He wants to share in our happiness, too. What a joyous thing to think about.